This school year…

I’m going to…

{Photo credit to WeHeartit}

I know you guys have read/seen this quote on Tumblr or on Twitter a million times already but guess what? This will be one of my mottos this year

Like what Kelly Clarkson said “I’ll spread my wings and I’ll learn how to fly. I’ll do what it takes til’ I touch the sky. And I’ll make a wish. Take a chance. Make a change, and breakaway” I have started spreading my wings starting the last half of sophomore year. It sort of stayed like that the whole of junior year and I even thought of hiding under a rock again. But I’m like, nah. I already had made progress. Haha.

Starting this year, I will join any activity. Haha. I wanted to join activities ever since freshman year but after the one that happened in Great Minds Meet, that’s when I decided to not join any contest and stick to sitting in the bleachers HAHA. Whatevs.

Oh, and just so you know, my shyness has ruined a lot of good opportunities. 😦 So yeah. TAKE EVERY CHANCE,   DROP EVERY FEAR. 🙂

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High school wasn’t meant to last forever

I can’t believe I’m officially gonna be a senior on Monday. It hasn’t really hit me yet. Oh, and by the way I saw this post somewhere a long time ago. It goes like this (I changed some of the words just so I could relate, and some of you would too haha):

Senior year is unlike any other. Here are a few things you should know.

It won’t hit you when you wake up for your last first day of school. It won’t hit you as you walk into the hallway for the first time as an official senior. It won’t hit you when you get a “soul” (It’s a thing in my school when you’re a senior). It won’t hit you when you cheering your heart out in your last sportsfest. It won’t hit you when you’re filling out countless college application forms. It won’t hit you when your singing boring Latin and christmas songs during Cantata. It won’t hit you when you go to prom (or in my school, Banquet). It won’t hit you when you attend your last camp. It won’t hit you when you have a good time during Batch Night. You don’t realize you’re going to graduate in a month while you’re defending for your thesis.
But you begin to realize it in graduation. It’s the time you look around and realize you will never see half of these people again. You will begin to see it more over the summer when everyone is packing their bags, putting down posters, almost emptying their closets. It still hasn’t fully hit you when you’re sitting in your half-empty room, about to leave the house you’ve lived in your whole life. Probably, you’re laughing with your best friend about all the stupid stuff you’ve done. And next thing you know, you’re already in your dorm, getting class schedules, going to orientations. That’s when it will hit you. When you’re sitting in your dorm room with a stranger you have to live with for the next 4-5 years.

That’s why you need to make every moment of your senior year count. You will only get to do it once. College will be a lot of fun, but in the mean time, jump at every opportunity you get. Do anything thatt you have ever wanted to do live prove your teachers wrong and get beyond high grades. Spend as much time with friends as possible. For it will not be long until you meet new people and inevitably grow apart.

To be honest, I’m really scared of senior year and the future. I’m afraid of facing senior year because
1. My batchmates are going to take over. They’re gonna be ministers. Most of them were my classmates and I’m really afraid they might change.

2. I haven’t made amends with one of my friends I had a misunderstanding with sometime this summer. And I’m really nervous what will happen on Monday HAHA We may be still friends after, or not. Que sera, sera. And note to self: Ignore. Just ignore what ever bad thing will happen. Oh and I did my part (or I think I did)… anyway erika pls don’t let yourself down and by the words of Zayn Malik, I quote “Don’t over think, just let it go”. Lol.

3. On Monday, if ever my friends decide to eat and hang out during breaks in the upper bleachers, I’m afraid I’m gonna eat alone again. Like what happened last year. I told them I didn’t like it there because I don’t like heights. But then, some of them even made fun of me. I hope it’s still funny when you’re in hell. And no one even bothered to check up on me. They just went down AFTER they ate. I didn’t even finish my lunch because a trashcan was near me and some boy batch mates were looking at me and I think they pitied me. No, no, guys. You got it all wrong. I HAVE FRIENDS (or I think I have friends), I just didn’t have lunch with them bc they’re being inconsiderate. HA HA. OKAY.

4. WHAT IF I FAIL CALCULUS OR PHYSICS…. OR FOR THE FIRST TIME P.E WH A T I F
5. What if I get placed in the “hell” part of school a.k.a the main building. *knocks on wood* I RLY HOPE I DON’T WTF
6. I don’t like things to end. Really.

I’m really afraid of the future because
1. I am really afraid. I’m excited but then again I’m scared.

2. Because what if I don’t get in one of my dream schools?!

3. Or worse, what if I get in one of my dream schools and what if after I graduate, I don’t get a decent job

4. WHAT IF NO ONE FALLS IN LOVE WITH ME AND I END UP LIVING ALONE WITH 40 CATS

5. OR WORSE WHAT IF I BECOME A HOBO

I just… I’m nervous, scared and excited for everything right now. Really.

P.S: I included a new category. “Senior year” haha. Obvsss, I won’t be posting things under Junior year anymore 😛

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