Every inch revealed, as my heart is pierced

Earlier, I was looking for “The Little Prince” book and baby pictures for the yearbook. Sooo me: *looks everywhere*

I searched every shelf, every cabinet, but I have failed to find The Little Prince and a super cute baby picture. But I did see class pictures, my report card when I was a Sophomore, seatworks, quiz papers with red ink on it, the pink clearbook my crush held and even said it was cool, piano sheets, lanyards I used for my slider phone, my first ever diary with a fake lock, letters from friends and used to be friends, this Disney autograph book my godmother gave years ago, the folders I used during tests when I was in grade school, TigerBeat magazines, my then favorite book, pens that don’t even have ink anymore, all those doodles when I was a Freshman, my Physics book I bought when I was a Junior Year but never really used it, the ponytails I used to wear every Thursday and Friday back in Elementary, the Strawberry Shortcake pastels, this really creepy pen doll that even if it’s really creepy, I refuse to throw it away because it was given to me by my classmate, this Rose pen that used to light up that I got from Singapore, my first ever wallet with my name written on it, CDs from 2008; the reign of Jonas Brothers and Hannah Montana,  this Sabrina the Teenage Witch toy I got from McDonalds, the stress ball I used to squeeze when I was younger because I had anger issues,  a picture of me and my dad during my 9th birthday a.k.a my last best birthday I ever had because he went home for my birthday, a picture of me and my childhood friends during a fieldtrip before we went separate ways and never really talked again.

You see, these might be unimportant to you guys. But to me, it’s important because these things that I mentioned above mean a lot to me because they saw me. Lately (like for almost a year), I’ve never really been me. You know what I mean? I felt so lost and hopeless and I was having s thoughts again which is pretty much not good because I’ve lost the progress I made.

But you guys know what, this really helped me. I’m glad I was able to see these things again. These things are pretty much junk but these things are bits and pieces of my life.

I wish people would just see what I am like and what it is like to be me. I wish people wouldn’t really judge immediately (but no they judge rly fast). I wish people would understand. I wish people would hate me less, I wish they had a reason to hate me because of me (like my personality and shit) and not because of what I’ve done in the past. I wish they would tell me what’s wrong so I would know. I wish people were a lot nicer. 😦

I wish my friends would come back to me. I wish my friends don’t treat me as back up anymore just because they found new cooler friends. I wish I could see my family often. I wish my grades would smoke weed and get high like before. I wish this year would be a lot better than last year. I wish everything would be okay. I just ausbgjba 😦 I’m really trying.

“So let your heart hold fast for  this soon shall pass. There’s another hill ahead.”

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Shake it out

Aaaand it just hit me. I’ll be graduating in 2 months. Everything is happening so fast like oh my god. I can’t even catch up. I wish time would slow down.

Plus, it also hit me that when you look back, everything is so much different. Last year, this time, I was all  “omg kilig kilig” because crush. Now, I’m “Shit kill me now.” Last year, I was hating people. Now people are hating me. HA HA. But I don’t care because the group who hates me hates a lot of cool people… which makes me cool too? HAHA kidding. I really don’t care about their group because all they do is judge people everyday and pretend to be friends with each other. So yeah, hate all they want I’ll be out of hell in a few weeks.

Aaand in other news:

THIS WEEK’S HIMYM EPISODE IS JUST OH MY GOD?! It’s like will Marshall and Lily go to Italy or will they stay. Will Robin and Barney have a ring BEARer? OooOooOhH. Only 16 hours left before the wedding.

I’ve been high because of pastillas and yema. HA HA HA.

*secretly wishes I was part of the yearbook committee*

I was supposed to go out today for my creative shot but nah

I’ll be Queen Dido for Lit oh my god I’m finally going to be a legit queen for a day hahahaha 🙂

Groupworks make me cry especially when I’m not groupmates with my friends.

I am sick and tired of being the backup friend. Pretty much done with every human being.

Wow I forgot what happened for the rest of the week but this week was really okay. And I’m scared for next week bc karma… idk. HAHA. That is all x

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You can’t win at everything but you can try

This day sucked. But this week was an okay week heh

As you all know, I failed my dream school.

Hendall pictures

Plus there were a lot of people in Prism awhile ago which I didn’t really like because I had a hard time breathing (#claustrophobicprobs)  so I just stayed outside until it was my turn.

Buuut I have the hard copy of How They Met by David Levithan

And I watched Bride For Rent with my friends yesterday yey (XIAN LIM IS A HOTTIE)

Buuut before that I was sort of nahiya and shit bc I thought I was going to go with a group but I ended up not going with them bc ~~OP~~ so I walked alone until I reached Ramyun where I found my friends and asked them if they wanted to watch the movie. They said yes but because they didn’t bring informal clothes, they had to go home. So I waited for like 1 and a half hours 😦 But it was okayyyy

I finally made up my mind. I’m going HIMYM style in my creative shot because someone might do the same pose with a poster so yeah. 🙂 I bought my blouse and I have yet to buy a yellow umbrella 😉

I solved Figure #6 in the L.E. Oh my god I have engineering blood hahahaha

I still want to take up Archi but idk I’m excited for Marketing

Can I pls pls pls pass UST. Pls.

You have made it to the “People who will get accused as a witch and get burned at a stake” list. Annoyinggg.

I hate everyone and I don’t have any friends anymore. But that’s okay. I’m okay. I still have a boyband and wifi.

And if ever you ask yourself “If I’m not your friend, what am I” idk like back up idek I am just tired of everything and everyone to be honest. People suck. I think we need a new plague.

That is all xx

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Time to crey

I THINK IM GOING TO CRY OMFG YEAH IM CRYING JEZUS HAHAHAHA =(((

cry

 

😦 Okay but I know God has other plans. Better plans. Goodbye dream school :(((( UST nalang pls :(((((( sigh

Happy birthday Zen

Untitled

HOW THE HELL ARE YOU 21?!? LIKE NO NO N O P E.

Okay so yeah I was a Zayn girl during my carrot days. Really. And then Perrie came in like a cannonball (see what I did there) and boom. I went for the curly one of the band. Nevertheless, you’re still special to me and you will always be.  No matter what. You mean the world to me because you make me happy and you help me get through every shit. And I will always thank you for that. Also, thank you for existing, Zayn Javaad “Beyonce” Malik. I love you so so so much.  Even though most of the time, I don’t know where the hell you are and what you’re doing and wtf the next thing  I know is that you’re posting selfies on Twitter with an iguana jezus zayn i asdhagjba. You’re so unpredictable. I do hope you enjoy the rest of your 2014 and please just don’t get married this year. Well I’m not saying never get married, I’m just saying not this year. Please please. There’s still next year and the year after that. You have a lot of years ahead of you, take  my advice and take things slow okay and live while you’re young. You need to because you’re only 21 once ((sobs uncontrollably)). Again, I love you so much and happy happy birthday again, Zayn! ♥

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Hope your heart is strong enough

Hey hey hey people! Guess who’s back? Back again? I’m baaack tell a friend 🙂 Lol I’ve been away for like a year *badum tss* Okay I suck at telling jokes… and Algebra. Ah, yes. Algebra. I have failed HAH (final grade which means i might not walk the red carpet idek???) But still, that won’t let me give up and ruin my year. Okay. It’s just a failing grade. That doesn’t mean I’m stupid. I know a few people who failed too. And I think we all deserve a second chance. We deserve to walk dat carpet hyfr, and we will. #TiwalaLang HAHA   

Oh and did you know that I might be anemic hahaha. That or I have to go to an optometrist to get my eyes checked because I’ve had headaches for the past few days. So yeah. But I really have a feeling it’s because of my eyes. Remember my trip to the eye doctor last summer? Umhm. 

My laptop is broken and this time I think it’s not the charger. Huhu. I’m trading a trip this summer for a laptop for my graduation gift. I’m so lost without my laptop like wOW. It’s like my other half okay. Haha.   

Can someone help me think of a good pose and outfit for my creative shot for the yearbook? I might go for “feeling hipsta”  or “fangirl si ate” peg.

 Zayn’s turning 21 tomorrow and I don’t know how I should feel about this. 

Banquet next month and I have to lose weight and hunting for the best prom dress idk 😦 

This month until March will be the busiest months of my life. I s2g. I hope everything will be worth it 😦 

I passed SLU hah okay. I’m still waiting for USTET and DLSU results, then I can decide which uni 🙂 

One of my new year’s resolution is that I will never talk about you know who or at least stop talking about him both in this blog and in real life. Can I just say that I will never have closure. Never. Like I have this bet with one of my friends that each of us need to say goodbye to the boy who made us kilig (different boys haha) so I said f yeah, that’s gonna be easy and since I was counting down the days ’til graduation awhile ago I realized that saying goodbye will be difficult. It’s like the first and last time I’ll say goodbye.  And I don’t really know what to say or how to say it without being awkward. Wtf HAHA and it’s sorta embarrassing for the reason that what if the boy I used to like just snobs me and walks away just like he always does? Let’s just hope my friend forgets about the bet huhubells. Plus, I’m really sure I’m going to regret not saying goodbye to him or just talking to him. 

Exams are this week uGH. 

Oh and announcement: There will be no January playlist 🙂 Playlists will start February heh. 

That’s all, I guess? x

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